Observation vs. Judgement to Affirmation
One very important characteristic for exchange is, as all students abroad will have realized, observation. You constantly need to observe how things are being done and what is considered the cultural norm in attempt to assimilate into the culture. I think it's something that exchange students get pretty good at. One thing to realize is that observation may be seen as judgement by others. The difference is that observation is noticing things, but not connecting people's worth to it.
For example, my grandpa used to have a huge issue with smoking and (put nicely) doing things that my grandma disliked. Do I understand why my grandpa is like this? Completely. Do I detest what he did? Completely. The things that resulted almost drove me insane. But do I link my grandpa's self-worth to it? 100% no. Because as I stated in my last post, perfection is what we were made for (elaborated in the "Lights Lights Lights" post). Help people get as close to it as possible without being stressed. Last night he sent me a picture of him and another man with the caption, "Male nurse is quitting smoking!" Meanwhile, that man is holding a halfway smoked cigarette and he's holding the lighter, lol. He's always trying to connect and show his new ways... despite the irony, hahaha. Praise and affirmation. Why does everyone need that? It's a running theme in all my classes this year.
Today in Foundations, we talked about an ELL foster girl named Nora who was constantly marginalized by her peers. Nora did not follow "classroom scripts," and the teacher thought that she was a threat and nuisance in the classroom. The teacher's mantra was, "Talk and get an F." Nora would ask questions in class, but according to the teacher, that wasn't the "right way to learn." Nora would get ignored, and the students would separate themselves from her because she was challenging classroom norms. Then, when Nora attempted to fit in with the class culture, she was still being ridiculed for trying too hard. The teacher was rolling her eyes at Nora no matter what was done
Everyone in my ELL class was in shock. "How does a teacher like this exist?" But this study was only done 20 years ago, and the teacher was rigid and could not understand others. The students judged Nora because doing so would continue her exclusion and affirm their inclusion in the classroom. They viewed her as an outlier because challenged the boundaries of a context. Nora ended up dropping out of high school. Whoever says that school is a community is correct, but the school or classroom culture can definitely be an issue. Aren't we all supposed to create safe havens? You can be around a million people and find no community at all. Teachers and their classrooms should fight that.
What I think is interesting is that many people are dissatisfied with their lives. To be satisfied means that something needs to be different. But no one ever really wants to be different....isn't this just inherently...I don't even have a word for it. That's why I love students like Nora. As long as learning is occurring, then living is an active process.
It's in the Little Things
Yesterday in class a student walked in and said, "Who's having a crappy day today?" Pretty much everyone raised their hands. "Ok, well then I'm passing around my phone. My relative just had twins and they are so cute!" The phone came around as all the people in the class squealed with excitement at the 2 little bundles of adorableness in matching knit hats and blankets. Sometimes, it just takes a little thing to make the day better (haha, sometimes I think how it's ridiculous that little kids make me this happy, but it's true).
Same thing with exchange. Always remember that a small thing can turn the entire day around. If you don't know what that small thing is for you, reflect about it and ask a friend. They will usually know. We often get stuck in the same mindset and need refreshment. At the same time, however, a new mindset will also make a huge difference. When I was in Germany, being sick was literally the worst thing ever. But when I thought about how I could gain Tier 3 (technical vocabulary--in my case, medical) vocabulary, I didn't think it was that bad. Plus, I got to experience German "medical culture."
Open The Mouth
Back when I was teaching Senior (as in elderly) ESL at my Chinese school, I noticed that a lot of the students were scared to speak in English. They didn't want to sound weird. And this doesn't just apply to older people. I've seen students who did not want to speak a word due to fear. Well, I'm sorry, when you get to a new country with no previous language background (or even a little language background), you are going to sound weird. And you know what? It is completely fine. You may get laughed at. There are disrespectful kids who will tell you your oral presentation was "komplett Kacke." The good news is that they will be wrong once you get practicing and talking. You will improve. The biggest problem is when people tell me "...but I can't do it! I am just not good with languages." Let me say this:
If you tell yourself you can't, you are already limiting yourself. If you say "I am...(insert adjective or statement here), you are defining yourself. Do not degrade yourself, or you will seriously be going in that exact direction. The first step is to say that you are willing to change. The second step is to find a way to reach that goal in baby steps. It is not to wait for another human to come along to help or save you (many Germans always say Americans are either too superficial or passive aggressive--exchange students hopefully won't perpetuate the stereotype).
If you are really scared about sounding bad, I recommend being around young kids (ages 4-7 is great). I am not saying this just because I love kids and am an early childhood education major. I am saying this because most kids like to talk (there are the silent ones, though), and they especially love talking about themselves. As them a question. Or just say ONE WORD. They will carry it on. Just go up to them. They will want to drag you along to show you their newest invention, toy, etc. They also have limited vocab, so you will be hearing the same ones over and over again. For my host brother, it was "TOR!" (goal).
Oh, and...
If someone asks you how your day was and you have time to chat, use that as an opportunity to actually say something. Not superficial "Good!" (Sometimes I wonder if I actually learned this because I still say it all the time...)
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Haha, now that I reread this, I realize how the ELL professor today literally went on a complete rant about holistic language learning and USE as the primary means to improve. Quiet classrooms aren't good classrooms. I like buzzing classrooms with kids running around. It shows you that learning is occurring. When the hawks come in to ask about assessment, I can say, "Don't you see it happening before your eyes?" You don't always need a paper and pencil test.
Side note on testing:
Yesterday, I took my Children's Lit exam, and I just have to note on how great that exam was. It was half multiple choice/matching and half short answer. Instead of rote memorization questions (though there were some), there were also questions such as (not exact wording):
-Identify the blog you are reading. What are some posts you've read in the past week? (I have a choice here! But...I follow too many blogs in my free time to remember which posts were from where).
-What is your favorite book that we have read together in class? (YAY. I get to talk about my favorite book!)
-Why is children's literature said to be a mirror and a window? (Mirror because it affirms you, window because when you get it right, you see both a reflection and a future...that metaphor is just sheer genius)
-Create a list of 10 guidelines you will use to evaluate picture books (note how she didn't say..."what are the 10 guidelines according to ____")
-What do you see impacting the future of Children's Lit? (Yes, synthesis right here! Your opinion in relation to the broader industry counts, which shows that you can make a difference).
Why exactly am I spazzing over the goodness of an exam...I have no idea. I probably didn't do extremely well either (sometimes I felt like I was taking an Art exam...line, color, shape, style, space, value..), but I still liked the test. I honestly can't understand myself...hahaha. Last year, I got super happy when the SPED professor asked us to write down 3 things we learned in his class that wasn't tested on the exam. Then he gave us bonus points.
Bias in Testing--CONTEXT!
Context and balance are my 2 theme words for the year. Actually, they are 2 of my theme words for life. Today we were talking about bias in testing, which gives another great example of how language can be misinterpreted. Test question:
Sam can purchase his lunch at school. Each day he wants to have juice that costs 50 cents, a sandwich that costs 90 cents, and fruit that costs 35 cents. His mother has only $1.00 bills. What is the least number of $1.00 bills that his mother should give him so that he will have enough money to buy lunch for 5 days?
10% and 18% of the American Indian and African American students respectively interpreted the word only as restricting the number of dollars ("his mother only has $1"). This interpretation was not observed by the white students.
Just thought this was interesting..part language barrier, part context, I think.
Respect and Protect
Make sure you don't talk trash about your host family. Make sure you don't talk trash at all, no matter what they did. I've seen these "Dear Host Family..." posts on Facebook, and a fair share are complaints (I probably have quite a few in my head too). But if you have a problem, bring it up with them, and them only. Do it face to face whenever possible. I also have the problem of needing to vent at times, but it is clear-- it is always better to uphold someone's dignity, because they are able to change. If you are nice to people, they will usually be nice back. If they take advantage of you, forgive them. If they are being unreasonable after talking it out, seek help from someone who knows German culture.
Side note: If what you want to say is something you won't tell people in person, do not post it online. Even when your name is not associated with it. So many people have courage when they sit behind a computer screen. Build courage in person (in real life) instead of hiding behind a machine. That's when fear truly melts away. There is recently a video circulating around about lessening the use of smartphones and other electronics. I guess I could go on a complete rant about how technology effects education and how exchange students should beware of falling into the trap of "technology is my best friend"...but this post is already too long.
And I say this a million times each day, but it never ceases to be true: The concept of respect is to be earned in many countries. Try to forget that. Respect is always a given :) No respect= pushing people down. Everyone influences you. Don't push people down. When something goes wrong, the first person you need to forgive is yourself.
Know What Makes it Unique
"What's similar? What's different?" This is one of the most popular workbook exercises for young children. And I have realized just how important this is... it carries on for the rest of your life. When I applied to CBYX, I had to tell interviewers why I wanted to be a part of this program and not any other one. Not being able to articulate it would be a huge issue. It's exactly like applying to colleges, which CBers talk about all the time (because most of them are applying after their exchange year). If you don't know what is great about something, then you probably a) don't want to be there b) can't appreciate it to the fullest. The school sees straight through when the motives are wrong. It's not a good fit. I hope people understand that about exchange programs as well.
In ELL class, we are looking at what makes each student unique and what his/her experiences/cultures bring to the table. We have an additive view of children. We want them to feel welcome, useful, and happy.
Sometimes It's Good Not To Know
Trust me, I used to like to stay in the loop of things. Well, after being abroad for a year, I've realized that some things are better left unknown. I think I can understand more than ever why God doesn't reveal everything to people, although he does often provide prophecies and words of knowledge. If you know though, you are required to act. While abroad, I wanted to learn German as fast as possible. When I actually started becoming more aware of the language, I wished I didn't understood everything I heard. But I think that's just the risk of knowing, and when you go abroad, you are opening yourself to a world full of unknowns. The real test is how you will deal with it.
Use What You Know
In the beginning of Language and Literacy class, we watched a video about working memory. And there was this one quote that I loved. It was this:
“Oftentimes, we think that we have to relate new knowledge to prior knowledge. What we want to do is spin that around. We want to take all of our existence and wrap it around that new knowledge and make all of these connections and it becomes more meaningful.”The old, aka the exchange year, will always be an asset. Wrap it around the new knowledge so that learning takes place. I think that was my main purpose in writing today. To see how I could wrap every single part of my existence around this new information in order to improve. Improvements are always good! :)
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